GWW XVI

I always leave SCA events feeling conflicted and Great Western War XVI was no different. As with anything else in life you get out what you put in, and my camping group (we call our camp Shanty Town and we are thus Shantinians) tends to skim the surface. We spend our time relaxing, disconnecting from our mundane lives, and partying. This is in stark contrast to our friend Liam who has dedicated himself to the game.

Years ago it was my brother that first got us to go to SCA events. He had somehow managed to jump, with both feet, into a widely known group with a serious reputation. We, however, were in no way serious enough to hang out on that level and so Shanty Town was born. We were a shabby group, but we were fun. We started almost immediately to define our sub-subculture. We were opposed to drama and sobriety. We were for friendship (new and old) and creativity. We (being college students or new to our careers) couldn't afford the expensive "period" tents and other camp supplies so we made do with what we could. We had a set of nylon tents for which we built burlap covers. One of our many mottoes became "we aren't dumb, we're poor." 

Now its been years and a couple of us have period tents, all of us have jobs. We have more of the infrastructure and experience that could turn us into a more legitimate group, but our free-spirited origins stay with us. At this event, we brought home made mead and cider, jugs of cheap Carlo Rossi sangria (upon which we had first founded Shanty Town), and expensive rum, whisky, and gin. We are a mixed bag. Maybe it is our inconsistency that keeps us young. We only make it out to a couple of major events each year, so we skim the surface without putting in deep roots.

Now Liam is a knight. He has spent years getting to this point. He hasn't camped with us in a long time. He has found a group to belong to and call family and he is well respected there. He has come a long way and I am proud of him, even if this journey has taken him away from the rest of us. He is a strong man, a good husband and father. His knighting ceremony was at this event (even his father made it to the campsite even though he does not play). I had no idea that it was going to happen, and when some of us went to see him the night before, we were rebuffed by clipboard wielding keepers. Its like we were at different events.

Now I am back in the real world. There are so many more rules here. There is so much to do. I have to prep old computers to go back to the leasing company and deploy new ones to replace them. I have to study physics models of balancing forces and calculating energy lost or gained. In short, I have to get back to reality. Around the campfire, the ideas for new projects grew fast and grand. We want to make all kinds of things, but to what end? I go to an event about once a year, and I hardly need more clutter in my life and my space. Now I am home and the SCA seems so frivolous and far away. I wish I could be more involved, but I just can't.

First kiln firing

I have finally fired my kiln!
On Saturday I fired my first bisque and on Monday my first glaze. Neither firing went perfectly but the results were better than I dared hope.

The bisque firing was supposed to be cone 06 but I ran out of time (I was going to see One Night in Miami by Kemp Powers for the fourth time) and had to turn the kiln off early. I am not sure how close it got to the right temperature. My 05 and 06 witness cones survived unscathed but the ware was within the bisque range so it must have been close enough. I had a teapot, 4 cups and 7 bowls. I did loose one bowl to cracking but I believe it had been weakened by handling before the firing.
For the glaze firing I gave myself all day to get it done. I was aiming for cone 5 so I set the kiln for normal speed, 2150°f, and put the time at 12 hours, which is the longest it will go. After 8 or so hours I started using my shade 10 welding goggles when looking in the peephole to check the cones. After 11 hours the #4 come had bent over completely. By 12 hours the #5 cone had bent to 90° (pointing at 180° for those of you who love polar coordinates) so when the timer went off (sounding like a kitchen egg timer) I shut everything off, and went to bed. I unloaded the next night.

I fired the teapot, the 4 cups, and one bowl all with the same Laguna Clay forest green (ms-4) glaze. The glaze all melted nicely and the kiln wash on the shelves saved me from the sleight drips I had on one of the cups. The application was a little spotty because I did not have enough glaze to dip the pieces and had to apply it with a brush. There was a fair amount of flow of the glaze and the lips of the cups came out a bit thin but nothing to worry about. I got a little pinhole-ing of the glaze and clay sagging on a bowl that was on the bottom shelf so I may need to be careful what I put down there.
The teapot and two of the cups are a donation to an auction held by a charity called More Than Me that a co-worker of mine works with. I am proud of the way they came out and I hope that it can bring in a good donation.

All in all a success!

Kiln test

This weekend I tested the coils in my electric kiln. I was told to check that all of the columns were working by placing a slip of paper behind each coil and turning on the kiln. I performed this test and every coil charred it's slip. Now I need to read the manual and do a first firing. I am going to aim for this weekend. I just need to finish some cups first.

Are you buying a copy or a license?

Last night while struggling with a screwed up circadian clock, I came across this article on the tech blog Gizmodo. It got me thinking about what it means to own something. The article talks about a traveler who had his books deleted from his iPad when he traveled to Singapore. It seems that Google Books is not allowed to operate there so the books were removed automatically.
When you buy a book from Amazon or Google, you have purchased a license to access that text. When you buy a physical book from a store, you have purchased a copy of that text and you own that object (usually a codex with the text printed in it). It is much harder to track and remove a book from someone's bookcase than it is to remove it from someone's e-reader, and revoking a license is easier that repossessing a book.
This sparks a very terrifying scenario in my mind. It wasn't that long ago that the Nazi party ran around burning books and Stalin had books re-written to match his ideology. Not to leave out my own country that blacklisted books, authors, and artists to protect against the "communist threat." If a similar totalitarian government were to come to pass in the future, the removal of "objectionable" material would be much easier. In a world where books are controlled by major corporations and can be edited or deleted in real-time, the existence of those books is at the pleasure of those corporations and the governments within which they operate.
Before you calm me a paranoid alarmist, consider the rampant censorship of the internet that happens in China. Google actually took down google.cn and redirected traffic to google.com.hk over the restrictions the government was imposing, but that did not solve the problem as China has blocked Google in different ways for different reasons. Facebook is outright banned there.
I had a few friends over a couple of weeks ago and when one of them saw all the bookshelves covering am entire wall in my bedroom he commented "nice antique collection" and stated proudly that he has gone all digital. In a country that not long ago banned books and blacklisted authors and artists, in a world where you can have your license to a song or a book revoked without realizing to is happening, I am happy to hold on to my hundreds of antiques.

Mead Batch 10

My Novia and I just finished bottling batch 10 of our mead. This batch has been sitting in secondary fermentation for about a year. I was very worried that the batch would be ruined from all that time unattended. We ran the batch through the first (3 micron) filter and tasted it. It came out very strong with a vanilla and orange flavor. It was so strong, in fact, that I knocked it down a little with some water. Because of the time it spent in the fermentation, bottle it is ready to drink now but will only get better with the coming months.

Here are the details:
Original notes lost.
orange blossom honey
Sat in secondary fermentation for about a year in unstable conditions (imperfect fermentation lock, weather conditions, etc.)
After first filtration, hydro reading: 1.002
Tasting notes: orange and vanilla
Added approx 1.5 liters of water after third filter. Final reading: 1.001

Degree Options

As part of my plan to get a bachelors degree, I have been struggling lately with the decision on which degree to pursue. I am interested in getting in to programming but I am afraid that a Computer Science BS may not be for me. Firstly it seems like a lot of work. The math and physics requirements are very high. I am not confident that I could finish a degree like that in 2 years (after transferring). In addition: I am not interested in microprocessor design or building enterprise software so there is no need to torture myself.
I am looking at other adjacent degrees but it is difficult to decide which one will be the most beneficial. Computer Information Systems could be a good fit but, as I understand it, it is more of an IT degree. I don’t want to be a systems administrator, I want to be creating new things. The best and worst thing about this degree is that at many colleges it is part of the business department. I could add a strong understanding of business management to my computer knowledge.
Cognitive Science sounds extremely fascinating but the career prospects are squishy. Some degrees are more solid than others and CogSci looks a little bullshitty on paper. That being said, I am very drawn to the idea of studying how the mind works and getting into the details of human-machine interaction. If I can get a minor in CS, it may bolster the credibility of this option.
A friend of mine instilled two bits of wisdom on my at about 2AM on last Sunday night. First he said that if I don’t get a degree with “computer” in the title, I had better have a good portfolio to prove that I can do the programming. Second, he said that if I am going to go that route, I should pick a degree that is going to hold my interest and keep me invested long enough to graduate. My girlfriend keeps reminding me to keep my eye on the prize and to focus on taking the classes (and secondarily the degree) that will get me into my chosen field. If I get derailed onto an easier degree path that does not relate to my career goals, then this entire exercise will have been for naught.
How about you, friends? Do any of you out there have experience with these degrees? Do any of you have advice on which path to take?

Inside The Actors Studio: Hugh Jackman

On a recent flight to New York, I had a chance to watch an episode of “Inside the Actors Studio.” This episode featured Hugh Jackman. I have liked Hugh’s work for various reasons but had not realized how many fantastic films he has acted in. From fun action films like the X-men series and swordfish to tense thrillers like “The Prestige” and emotional films like Les Miserables. It was during the discussion of Les Miserables and in analysis of his performance that I really came to understand one of the most beautiful themes of the film.

I have loved the Musical form of Les Mis for a long time. I have seen it staged three times and when I watched the recent movie version, I cried. The themes of love, righteousness (for good and ill), and protection resonate with me. In this interview, they play a clip of Jackman singing “Who am I?” This clip was chosen for its emotional depth and the raw quality of his singing performance. The conversation was on the unusual process of filming a musical with the songs performed live on set and the accompaniment being performed live (on piano before later doing the orchestral work) to match the actors performance. The scene was not one of my favorites. I thought that the choice of location was strange and the camera angles too tight. This time, however I saw the scene in comparison to the later reprise by Javert.

The question of “Who am I” is not one asked in a static situation, it is one of revolution. The re-assessment of ones life when you have reached a point of no return. ValJean decides to tear up his parole papers (and symbolically his previous life) and to become someone new. Alone, and at the end of his rope, ValJean chooses to be reborn, to dedicate himself to become a righteous man and to rebuild. Never mind the improbability of a man rising from the dregs of society to become a mayor, that part is glossed over. The point is that he choses life.

In a similar situation of desperation, Javert chooses death. Javert is an agent of order. He believes in the righteousness of the law and cannot conceive of a situation in which disobeying the law is the right thing to do. When confronted with a criminal, who is in fact a good man, his world view is shaken. Javert’ paradigm cannot survive such a shaking and he commits suicide. He sings “I’ll escape now from that world /  from the world of Jean ValJean,” and so he finds his escape in death.

There are many times in our lives that we each must re-evaluate what the world is and who we are. I knew from the first night I met my girlfriend that I would have to be a better version of myself to be with her. I have had to change my career choice when confronted with the insufficiency of my current trajectory. I will need to redefine myself when I have children and will have to redefine again when they are gone from my care (but never from my heart).

What do you do when you are confronted with a world that does not work for you? cry out “Unfair!” entrench? refuse to change? You may as well ask the sun to rise in the west. Sometimes people cheat. Sometimes there is no food. Technology advances. Children grow up. Gravity pulls us all. When faced with these constant changes, I try to think of it as a constant process of refinement. I try to see the parts of myself that are not helping me and reshape them into a better form.

The interview ended with an excellent question from a producing student from the California Institute of the Arts. She asked how acting helped in his personal and professional relationships. This question sparked some very profound words from Hugh. he starts by saying “One of the greatest roadblocks in a relationship is how increasingly we take things for granted.” The automatic reactions to things and a lack of being “Awake” and in the moment can rob the life from interactions. It is easy to fall into a state of not giving yourself to the moments and people in your life. He goes on to say “Sometimes you can sleep for years in a relationship. You're not really awake not really looking in each others eyes not really seeing each other for the first time.” Here again I see the choice to live or not presented in your everyday existence. One must always strive to be awake and present otherwise you are not living but merely existing.

I will be present in my life and make myself into the person I want to be. (unless the zombie apocalypse happens in which case forget this touchy feely bullshit, I will do what it takes)

Changing Flow Direction

It sure has been a while. I am through with Spring 2013 semester. I am getting close to being able to transfer to a 4-year institution. I have decided not to take any classes during the summer. The pace of summer is very demanding, and the classes that I have left to take are tough so I decided to leave them for the fall full semester and to shift gears and spend my summer working on projects and being creative. I am really itching to produce some of my own work, especially after my two week vacation in Italy. I saw so many things, and took in so much inspiration It is time to change from input to output.
With my new found time I have started doing a little pen turning and hope to get back on the ceramic wheel. I have had the electric kiln for months now and I still haven't fired it. I am also looking forward to being able to spend some time learning to program.

Perhaps I have too many hobbies?

Spring 2013

It has been a tough semester. I have only been taking three classes but with the combination of work and school, I have been struggling. I have had so many irons in the fire (to use a blacksmithing metaphor) that I have had to make choices on what gets dropped and what gets completed. A couple of times I did not make a decision and just dropped something accidentally. This is how I earned a C in my online Anthropology lab. But I am finally through with the semester. Due to some confusing decisions that the school made; there was no winter session and there will be an inconvenient late spring session. I may be back in summer but I have to wait until they release the schedule on Tuesday to know for sure. I am only 3 or 4 classes away from transfer and that is exciting.

I'm not sure where or even if I will transfer so I am trying to keep my options open. Now I am stoked to get a little free time and to work on some intern work and for my impending trip to Italy. (I guess I should say a very little bit of free time)

Limited Bandwidth

It has been a difficult few weeks. I have been busier this last month than I have been in a long time, and I have been having a little trouble keeping focused, keeping up on all of my projects.

I am currently:

• Working a full time job
• Getting my general education credits in order so I can transfer as a junior
• Beginning a part time internship
• Studying for my CCNA exam
• Trying to live my life

The hardest part is staying focused and driven on all of these projects. Willpower is an exhaustible resource, and I have been running out. I get to the point at the end of my workday where I want play ingress (more on that later) or go see a play or have a nice dinner with my Novia. I am running out of bandwidth and need to find out how to accomplish all of my goals. 

Perpetual

I am here at school again. I am waiting for my Physical Anthropology class to start. We will be watching yet another video. I think that I could probably teach this class at least as well as the teacher does. The hardest part of this class is reaching back more than 10 years to when I first learned this stuff in freshmen year of high school. I haven't studied (other than reading the chapters in the book yet I am very confident that I will pass the test next week.

I just keep getting the feeling that I am wasting my time with this class. I just need to focus and finish the class and earn the credits.
Some days it feels like I have been taking classes here forever.

Plan B

It has been a confusing few years. I have gone from one job at a small company to a very different one at a mid sized company. I have lived alone, moved back home, lived with my girlfriend and finally moved back home again with her. I have had many different plans and goals and some have been accomplished, some abandoned, and some obviated by circumstances. I am constantly re-evaluating what I want to do and be. This makes it difficult to definitively state what my plan is. All I can do is say what my plan is now.

I have been going to school with the aim of earning some form of bachelors degree. This is ever more seeming like a plan B. For a long time I have been of the opinion that the really successful people in the world do not need a college degree to achieve their success. I reluctantly embraced a return to school, and have been taking classes again. After a careful examination of the Bachelors degrees that are reachable, I have come up with CIS or Business Management instead of the more interesting Computer Science. I have become more and more interested in programming and although CS is the degree that would get me there, the required classes seem too onerous to be a real option.

I have been attempting to learn programming and to meet programmers. First, I went to the first Los Angeles "Drink Up" hosted by the website Github. This website offers code hosting, version tracking, and bug tracking. While there, I met a couple of guys who run Lemur Heavy Industries, a guy who wrote this Rails Tutorial and had some good conversations. I have also met some programmers while playing Ingress. Add to this the very enviable work situation of my friend OrangeWolf in programming freelance and as an employee. I want to do the kinds of things that these people do. I want to make useful application and work on new things.

I want to have a job where I am creating things, not where I am playing hall monitor to keep people from deleting their browser history or telling them why they have to use Internet Explorer instead of Firefox. I understand that every company needs tech support, to fix broken computers and help clueless computer users, but I don't want to be that guy.

My plan now is to learn programming skills wherever I can and to build a portfolio. I need to build a cool website as an exercise in building something and as proof of what I can do. I plan on going to programming related social events and meet as many people as I can. The hard part is that these goals have no timeline and I have nobody to be accountable to but myself. I also have school taking up my time. I will need to find a way to set and achieve the goals on this while maintaining my progress on school.

One of the most important skills in life is being a "Self Starter" and I need to figure out how to make myself into one.